"You couldn't buy cheese from a hairy man. Can you imagine a hairy cheese
man? -Look, its a sasquatch selling cheese!"
-S.T.
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About the Message Book
It all started one fateful night, sitting around the kitchen table on a typical 3-11 late night. It started as a trickle at first – the odd comment here, nonsensical remark there – but it wasn't too long before we realised that we were funny, and stupid, and said funny stupid things all the time. Some of these comments were profound social commentary and some were profoundly dumb. Some we can be proud and keep our heads high from comments that we've said and some of us are embarrassed, disgraced, and rightfuly so. But the message book kept no secrets! So here it is, in all it's unabashed glory, for all the world to see,
THE 311 MESSAGE BOOK!!
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2011
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December
(45)
- French accent: "'Ey weel heet you with my baguette...
- "Give 'er HA!"-DMC9mar2001
- "Why is eating dinner before 4 trashy? I never ev...
- "Shave it!"-AR
- "Who drinks homo milk?" --DMC"I think I'm going to...
- "Roach Pipe!" --new tool invented by J.
- "So I got assigned the 'pornography of death', whi...
- "Dan you're a fungus. Katie is a spider plant."-J...
- "I am the turtle monster!"-J5feb2001
- "It's about a dirty slapper who meets this guy and...
- gesticulating drunkenly: "What you neeeed, is to H...
- "I couldn't master my broccoli... It became my ma...
- "It's fun when it swings around"-DMC, in reference...
- "What's the name of the game again? Millis Penis?...
- "Is that a real place, Bill's Penis, or whatever?"...
- "It's like why girls like Russell Crowe, it just f...
- "It's very hard to raise a baby polar bear."-J16ja...
- "If he wants to keep his freedom he has to keep it...
- "When you are in a communal shower situation, your...
- "I don't want to be bummed!"-PK13jan2001
- "We have lingering mouse poo, but it's not going a...
- In reading the previous comment, K. exclaimed: "Da...
- In studying for his biochemistry lab, Tom comes ac...
- "Why are you going to grate the turkey?"-DMC25nov2000
- "At least I know that if I lived in Rome, I'd be a...
- "If you think our life is like a cactus, then go ...
- "Please don't chew me"-SL
- "Now that I have alcohol, I don't need friends any...
- J. entreats us to "make sure there is at least one...
- "Did you like my creamy surprise?"-J6jun2000
- "MY HOT NASTY COCK!"-C.B.
- "Pooh is the major reason why I wouldn't get invol...
- J. and T.H. high-fived nose zits! Ewww.-30may2002
- "Do you like my pearl necklace?"-T.H. 30may2000
- (said in all seriousness) "What is your attitude ...
- "Have you seen my freaking herpes stuff?"-J.8mar2000
- "You couldn't buy cheese from a hairy man. Can yo...
- "I had a fat man go down on me once."-Leigh4jan2000
- "Your hair is too chesty!"-S.T.4jan200
- "I love the spoons." -S.Les4jan2000
- "I dated a fat man once." -T.K.4jan2000
- "You can't start a fire without sporks." -S.Les4ja...
- "My pants are stuck in my shoes." -J
- "I have a second rectum."-J
- "He can shave me if he wants!"-J
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December
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